Looking back and looking ahead

Photo by Fran on Unsplash

So that’s my wish for you, and all of us, and my wish for myself. Make New Mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes. Make mistakes nobody’s ever made before. Don’t freeze, don’t stop, don’t worry that it isn’t good enough, or it isn’t perfect, whatever it is: art, or love, or work or family or life. Whatever it is you’re scared of doing, Do it. Make your mistakes, next year and forever.

Neil Gaiman

2022 has come to an end and what a year it was! We have completed yet another revolution around the sun and hopefully, it has made us wiser in some aspects of our lives, and more foolish in others.

The past year has taught me to embrace ambivalence and contradiction. I have found myself always torn between two opposing ideas, thoughts, and feelings. Certain events in the past year revealed to me that I am strongest and weakest at the same things at the same time. I struggled with back and shoulder pain and found that those were also my strongest. I found that I had time to think before acting and acting before thinking. We all have heard how the people we love the most also hurt us the most but I realised that it was from those places of hurt that I could find the strength to love myself. Last year I moved more and stayed more still.

Looking back to the year gone by, I showed up consistently for certain goals and did not show up on some. But I am glad I didn’t because those are the spaces where I know I can work this year. I am not the one to make resolutions but this year I am going to work on ‘balance’. Small, bite-size goals will go a long way in building better habits.

Looking back and looking ahead are two sides of the same coin and a brand new year, with new hopes and new aspirations is the perfect metaphor for this paradox. We can’t build on thin air. We can only build on our mistakes. We can be stronger tomorrow because we are weaker today. But more importantly, weakness and strength, mistakes and rectifications co-exist in the same plane. They are all a part of who we are.

I pledge to allow myself to make mistakes without judgement and prejudice this year. What about you?